In keeping with my odd habit, here’s another rewritten song, “My Old Man’s a Provo” (Provisional Irish Republican Army) into something a little bit more libertarian.
My old man’s a prepper, with a Gadsden and a gun
The state has many enemies, but he’s their number one
He dresses like it’s Judgment Day in a homemade ghillie suit
And terrifies the cuckservatives right out of their jackboots
My teacher and classmates ask me at the school that I attend
“What hateful thing your racist father say on the weekend?”
I just smile back and say nothing, for their secret’s to me known
The bastards are just jealous, they ain’t got no father of their own!
On our TV the other night a cuckold came on to say
“There were racists at a rally for the GOA!”
They showed one of the “racists” holding up a sign with glee
I cheered and waved at my dad, and he waved right back at me!
At Christmas time it’s lonely, ’cause daddy’s not at home
He’s out protesting the NSA and the president’s love of drones
Last Christmas Eve the SPLC sent cops to our front door
They scrammed when out of a Humvee sled came a prepper Santa Claus!
My daddy’s got me worried, he’s low on doom and gloom
There’s just two tons of.22 ammo stored in his bedroom
“Are you gonna just shoot popguns dad?” I ask him just for fun
He said, “Don’t be an idiot, it’s for my Ruger Takedown, son!”
My daddy’s up in Heaven now, to me it’s just not right
I say a special prayer for him when I go to bed each night
Today would have been his birthday, so I prayed to him like this:
I hope to join you one day on the president’s kill list!